"Now this is football from the dream-factory"

Sorry this is not the english broadcast... that is where the quote is from... I dislike Man. United, but they look unbelievable right now...

Carlos Tevez reads Wayne Rooney's mind

As much as I try to dislike Manchester United, I have to say it is fun watching some beautiful football.

Now Ronaldo whines about himself

Cristiano Ronaldo doesn't think he should have received a red card for his apparent violent actions on the pitch last week against Pompey. "Sir Alex Ferguson was quick to condemn any reaction from his players, Ronaldo refused to accept that the red card he was given was justified."

According to Ronaldo, "The replays show there was nothing, but I don't need to look at the pictures, because I know exactly what I did - and that's nothing to justify a red card. I was pushed in the area. He came straight to me, put his hand on my neck and I opened my arms in a 'that's enough' way. We pushed each other but nothing serious. We leaned heads against each other but that was all. Absolutely nothing else happened. When I saw the red card, I couldn't believe it, the situation was so surreal. And it's absurd because I'm aware that now I'll sit out a ban for something I didn't do. I feel dejected and very sad."

AWWWWWW, such a sad Ronaldo. However, after Ronaldo "protested his innocence" someone tapped him on the backside to get his attention and Ronaldo flopped to the ground and looked for a foul.

Fergie the Vampire Whines about Ronaldo

Here is what Sir Alex Ferguson (a.k.a. the red devil vampire) said...

'My fear is, and I don't whether there is a directive, but maybe referees are a bit more tolerant of the physical contact'
'I've noticed this in the last few months -- late challenges are going unpunished. I thought these things were black and white. Late challenges are not allowed.

'We saw it again on Wednesday night, the referee letting it go unpunished time and time again. If you have got weak referees then you are going to be suffering.'
'There is a concern players like Ronaldo are going to be the victims... because it will end up with someone getting a serious injury.'

'It's very difficult to completely punish Ronaldo or be angry with him,' Ferguson said. 'Some of the things that are happening to him are not right.' 'We are dropping points and that's frustrating because the performance levels were very good.'

'The important thing is just to be patient now.
'The players will come right. It's frustrating, but it's recoverable of course.'

WAHHHH WAHHH WAHHHH!!!!

Carlos Tevez moving to Manchester United

Are you serious? I mean, are you cereal? Carlos Tevez, the Argentine striker is moving to Man. United... I knew he was a stinking red devil... thank god he'll be with his own kind... because Sir Alex is a vampire. But, sparing all the hate... this is a ridiculously incredible move. Man United needs another striker desperately to go next to Wayne Rooney. We saw this during the middle of last season when Henrick Larsson gave them such a lift and was a huge reason why they won the Premiership title. This deal with Tevez is only a loan at first, but has an option to sign a three-year deal after that. West Ham, where tevez curently plays, will be sure to get a hefty transfer and loan fee from United for the move.

LONDON (AP) - Carlos Tevez is due to undergo a medical in Venezuela as Manchester United close in on an initial two-year loan deal for the West Ham striker. If all goes to plan, an announcement a deal has been agreed between Tevez's adviser Kia Joorabchian and the Premier League champions could be made later on Friday. It is understood from sources close to the discussions that Tevez will initially join United on loan with the option of a permanent three-year deal worth in excess of £30million after that. Tevez is currently in Venezuela on Copa America duty and played in Argentina's win over Paraguay on Thursday night. The plan is for Tevez to join Manchester United on their pre-season tour to American once the Copa America is over. West Ham are believed to be in line for a compensation payment for releasing Tevez's registration to Manchester United.

... And ladies and gentlemen... the Red Devils just became more evil...

Cristiano Ronaldo and his man-purse

2007 English FA "Footballer of the Year" Cristiano Ronaldo was seen making an appearance at a fashion show in Portugal. I don't think I know of a male athlete that loves himself as much as Ronaldo. Fellow Manchester United teammate, Patrice Evra, revealed an embarrassing secret about Ronaldo, claiming that the Portuguese winger suffers from narcissism: “Cristiano makes me laugh because he is the only one to have his personal mirror in the dressing room. He spends hours doing his hair and putting on his gel. He loves his body.”

TheBigLead.com's had this take:

The best soccer player the planet may have to offer frequently wears tiny
swimming trunks, seemingly always finds himself poolside and shirtless with a
bunch of dudes, and he may or may not have a personal mirror in the dressing room. And here, we find Portugal’s Cristiano Ronaldo wearing a mustard yellow leather jacket, studded with diamonds. There appears to be more hair gel than necessary.

I'll admit though, he is an incredible football player and is the sole reason why Man United won the Barclay's English Premier League.

Sources: thebiglead.com and soccerfriend.com